Diets

...Random Holiday Thoughts

How come no one starts a diet during the holidays? Is anyone on a diet to gain weight? LOL, I am...

I think it's safe to say that beginning at Thanksgiving there are land mines ahead.
Turkey, pumpkin pie, ham, cornbread casserole, brownies, mashed potatoes, sweet pptatoes, fruit cake, mac and cheese...

That's a lot of land mines. And there's more.

My brother's sister bakes these yummy cookies with Hershey Kisses in the middle of them. That's trouble right there. I've been known to eat way too many of them. Even been known to put some in my pockets as I'm leaving.  Plus don't forget office parties that have lots to eat and drink. Hell there's a party wherever you go... I think that's why there are Weight Watchers,  Nutrisystems and Jenny Craig ads all over the boob tube right after the first.

This is the time of year for reflection, well reflect on this. I've written about this before but I'm always amazed when I think it's 2018 because when I was in high school the year 2000 the zero day... seemed so far off that you almost had to squint just to see it. Guess what? It's so far behind us now that you almost have to squint to see it.

This is also the time of year that we get to wear our sweaters, jackets and winter clothes the handful of times we get to. A little Florida secret, what is cold down here would be balmy up north. People here complain about the cold, if it dropd 10 degs... I used to live in Fairbanks Alaska, NY NY,  Chicago, IL and I always think the same thing, "You guys don't know what cold is." "Cold is -100 below zero... it'll a 100 degs and still be 'zero' ...that's COLD, 32 degrees lower than freezing cold water"...

Christmas is different now that my twin daughters are fifteen and son who is 10 yo. When they were younger gifts were Barbie dolls, cabbage patch kids, Thomas the Train sets and Sponge Bob stuff. Now? Video games and more importantly money.

Let's talk about another gift for fifteen year olds. They just got their driving permits so every time I head to the car I hear, "I'll drive, Dad." This is a great gift, the gift of driving. I have a question for all the parents out there, "How wide do your eyes get when you're teaching your kids how to drive and have you ever stifled a scream when they do?"

It's worst if you're teaching them to pilot a plane like a piper cub. And put it on autopilot. And they get into a smart car and turn on cruise control and goto the back and make a sandwich..."How wide do your eyes get when you're teaching your kids how to pilot and have you ever stifled a scream when they do?"

Just asking.

One of my sons hasn't learned yet to ease into the brakes so we kinda stop abruptly. While we're at it let's talk about a right turn on red. He knows it's legal what he didn't know was you have to stop at a red light before you make your turn. I learned the hard way that he hadn't yet grasped that concept.

That's where stifling a scream comes in.

An intructor the other day landed a plane in a kid bedroom pin the 17 yo aganst the wall, he died but the pilot walked out of it without a scratch. The instructor was teaching the student pilot how to fly a plane with simulated engine failure I hear. Must' ve been flying too low that day.

...That's where stifling a scream comes in. Hell that was a muffled scream by a dead man.

My daughter was asked again to sing at her office holiday soiree.  They told her to choose a few songs and one of the ones she picked was Silent Night and O Holy Night. She had me listen to Martina McBride's version (which is great) and as the song got going I found myself in my bedroom, on my bed, alone, singing along at the top of my lungs. It dawned on me I've heard that song my whole life.

"Fall on your knees. O hear the angels' voices."

Good stuff.

You know how this ends.

J